Treason

Iran is now and always has been the biggest threat facing the world. We have always been at war with Iran. This rogue nation is subject to the same guiding principle I use in all my dealings with the complexities of international relations: You are either with us or against us. We don't deal with Iran in any way other than to threaten them with extinction; and anyone who provides any aid or comfort to this terrifying enemy of the State must be dealt with most severely. You can imagine my dismay when I learned that Ronald Wilson Reagan provided thousands of missiles to Iran, along with some delicious caek. I'll forgive the confectionary contribution, because it had a bible verse frostinged onto the top; but the missiles I'm gonna hafta think about.